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24-07-2018 12:06 GMT
[WEEKLY SPECIAL FEATURE ARTICLE]
"THE EARMASTER WILL SEE YOU"
SRL News Column featuring mainstream music reviews of songs on Billboard's Hot 100.
THE EARMASTER WILL SEE YOU: DRAKE
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| A special feature article by indie writer, The Ghostwriter |
Explicit.
Currently sitting in the number 1 spot on the Billboard Hot 100:
Drake
In My Feelings
Hip Hop
Drake is a tricky artist to listen to. Hip Hop fans and critics have complained about artists like him for years. They've released good records but they've also released so many records ONLY for mass appeal, so many records that lack real substance and take hip hop far away from what it actually is all about that to listening to his records is like getting a blow job in broad daylight in between two parked cars from a persistent crackhead that really needs the money - you don't want anyone to know you're listening to it because deep down inside you are ashamed, but a part of you also knows it's just not right even though you can't really put a finger on why everytime. But you had either already hit the play button after seeing it online so many times, hearing about the hype, or discovering it on one of the pretentious (I would have preferred to say "fake ass" but I'm trying to polish my writing) mainstream music blogs that'll promote anything just to get on the big 3 record labels' good sides (again, I would have preferred to say "massage the big 3 record labels' balls).
Now Drake records are infectious, the production is always so amazing that if you removed the vocals you'd probably listen to them more than a few times a day and add them to every single one of your playlists. This is the same for a lot of mainstream records today. Music production has become so advanced and relatively easier than in previous years, so music producers and engineers are able to achieve amazing things sonically in considerably less time than they would have in the past.
Let's remember that music is all about self-expression - artists are well within their rights to say whatever they like. Music is only a few percent about the lyrical content so you can listen to a good song and never pay attention to what is being said but somehow you'll learn the lyrics over time from listening to it so many times. That's the issue with most music today, there's no poetry, no metaphors, no innuendo, nothing, just words in the form of everyday conversations, there's no art there. Most of the really good records don't let you understand them immediately - in fact it's almost as it they don't want you to at all. But nowadays lyrics are so simple, like nursery rhymes - how boring.
But back to Drake's new record...
I seem to be going round and round in circles because to be honest I don't like listening to Drake records for the very reasons I've outlined above.
Don't get me wrong, just yesterday I was listening to "I'm Upset (listen)". The first time I heard it, it was just alright - it had a consistent theme that meant something, it was repetitive, and the beat and the warm, dreary backdrop of the record even matched what was being said. But yesterday was Monday so you can bet your ass I wash smashed (Don't ask why - okay I'll explain since you insisted. I generally work all week. Mondays and Tuesdays is when the stress and sleep deprivation generally take their toll on me for some reason - I'll be smashed again tonight, maybe I'll listen to some Cardi B. Earmaster likie! But don't worry, I won't be going near any computers when I get back to the office).
So back to "In My Feelings". I know the beat is immediately going to suck me in and hook me, and I'll have limited control over my skip button finger once that happens, and find myself listening to the Canadian rich man talk about his personal problems like I'm supposed to take them on personally or something.
The first thing I saw when I headed over to iTunes was this:
EDITORS’ NOTES I HATE WHEN DRAKE RAPS
DRAKE SINGS TOO MUCH
DRAKE IS A POP ARTIST
DRAKE DOESN’T EVEN WRITE HIS OWN SONGS
DRAKE TOOK AN L
DRAKE DIDN’T START FROM THE BOTTOM
DRAKE IS FINISHED
I LIKE DRAKE'S OLDER STUFF
DRAKE MAKES MUSIC FOR GIRLS
DRAKE THINKS HE’S JAMAICAN
DRAKE IS AN ACTOR
DRAKE CHANGED
ANYBODY ELSE > DRAKE …
YEAH YEAH WE KNOW
How arrogant, to say the least. That's certainly no the way to talk to your fans and critics who buy all your mansions and cars. But what do I know? Plus, does Drake actually know what an editor does?
Anyways, let's get right down to the song review shall we?
Number of seconds before the skip button got hit: This is one of those records I'd only listen to when I'm at the club, bar or somewhere I can't rapidly attack the skip button. I have no idea what it's about since I couldn't listen to it long enough so forgive me for jumping to conclusions here. The first words I heard were "Keke, do you love me". That was it for me. So 5 seconds. I know it seems unfair but I don't want to hear another rapper rapping about the biggest booty he ever saw ever again. I'm sick of it!
Overall mood of the track: Love (probably just lust)
Will I listen to this again?: Hell no!
My mood after listening to this: Sick of this shit.
Originality: 0
Viability (will I buy it?): I'm not paying a grown man to moan in my ears.
How I would feel if I bought this: Like someone shoved a pineapple up my ass.
Safe for Kids (SFK)?: It's definitely for kids.
Safe for Work (SFW)?: Yes.
Your Brain on This: Indifferent.
Comments:
Just like I thought. This is one of those records that'll sound good after you've had one too many drinks, or much stronger "sedatives".
Stream song on Spotify:
Buy "In My Feelings" on iTunes:
https://itunes.apple.com/ca/album/scorpion/1405365674
Follow Drake on Twitter:
Official Website:
https://drakeofficial.com/Genre(s):
Hip Hop Music
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