Tired of listening to rape music

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SOUL NEWS

02-03-2023 14:55 GMT

CANADIAN MUSIC COLLECTIVE RECRUITING

Music industry update | Ontario, Canada | Indie artist, Brendan Scott Friel

I hate that I have to be the only one saying this here, and I hate to have to do it, but I’m sick of listening to smut every time I turn on the radio. I'm tired of listening to rape music. If I wanted smut I’d go back to my childhood bedroom and fish out my old novels with dodgy characters like Master Bates and Seamen Staines and read them till I fall asleep with a picture of Justin Bieber eating a Popsicle. I don’t know why he’s eating a Popsicle okay, that’s just the image I had in my head when I wrote this.

I mean I love sex, but God damn it! I don’t wanna hear it on the radio!

But you know what really gets me? It's the sound of grown men moaning in my ear at the beginning of every verse and every song. I don’t wanna hear that sh*t anymore, in fact I retired all my Biggie Smalls CDs when I realised he was doing it so much. In this new era of rape music (oops!! I mean rap music), it has taken on a new meaning now for me, and I don’t wanna hear it anymore. “Uuungh, uungh”, or like Rick Ross “Ooofff Ooofff”. What the F* is about to happen here is what anyone with a discerning mind would think right? I'm not getting baby batter in my ears on a Thursday morning on my way to work, that’s just disgusting. No more rape music for me, I’m sick of it. To be honest with you, I still have a really soft spot for female rappers and I’d totally still let Cardi B stick her filthy disgusting tongue in my ear and make any sound she likes – but only for 3 minutes though. And then I’ll push her away, slap her in disgust and tell her “I’m rich bitch, don’t you EVER stick your tongue in my ear again”. I don’t know why I would say that, but again, that’s just what I pictured myself saying in my head when I wrote this.

As I’m sure you can tell, a lot of stuff goes through my head when I’m writing, not just sex stuff. I’m a really deep thinker, in fact by the end of this article you would have discovered an amazing music collective and something new that you never expected to know in this lifetime. Okay maybe it won’t be that spectacular but I’ll make sure you learn something new and exciting for reading this far mkay? The catch is I won’t tell you when I’ve told you, you’ll just feel like you know stuff at the end of the article if you learn what I’m going to teach you. In fact I might have even written it already but I’m not telling. Nobody reads anymore, so you are really special and hence you deserve a little reward for your thirst for knowledge in this highly intelligent and sophisticated universe we live in that’s built entirely on thoughts and ideas. 

Now where were we? Ahh, yes, rape music, oops!! again, I mean rap… and deep thinking. Mn hmnn, let’s continue. Nowadays I refuse to let ambiguous thoughts into my head, they’re a recipe for a bad prayer, and in these difficult and uncertain times we are living in the last thing anyone wants is for God to finally answer their prayer and give them the exact opposite of what they asked for because they weren't clear and specific about what they wanted. You said you wanted a really bad b*tch, now you’ve got one and guess what? She's gorgeous, but she’s also made babies with everybody you know and you just found out she does cocaine and has been selling the sperm from your used condoms at the sperm bank when you fall asleep after sex at night. Yep! That’s pretty much what you’d expect of a really bad bitch. 

So I've stopped using words like “fire” to describe things that are amazing - I just say amazing. And I don't watch men's sports anymore. If Jesus comes back today and asks what I was doing on Friday evening before going to the club I refuse to tell him I went out to the Sports Bar to drink beer and watch many grown men play with balls and roll around on a grass field - he might totally get the wrong idea, he-he-he. 

 That’s why I never wear ripped or dirty jeans too, I’ve never been a bum, why the F* would I want to dress like one? That’s totally insane to me. I know we’ve strayed a little bit from the music news you and I are both here to explore but I just wanted to get that stuff off my mind first, I write better when my mind is clear. I’m so glad I did, I’m good now. Let’s go.

They've been hailed as the best thing since interdental brushes; and Canada’s exciting soul music collective Soul Music City Co-op is continuing to expand and bring exciting soul music back to centre stage where it belongs as the music industry changes and strays wildly from the organic soulful sounds that are at the very core of its foundation. Headed by Mike Hargreaves, an independent soul singer songwriter from Windsor, Ontario who was formerly known as Soul Brother Mike, the highly selective and sophisticated music outfit, which currently has 8 amazing singer songwriters on its roster was formed just over 3 years ago, back in January 2020. Soul Music City Co-op offers an alternative model to that of the traditional record label and artists retain 100% of their earnings. This week they announced that they are looking for their next big act, and they are inviting artists in and around Windsor, Ontario, Canada to get in touch. The music submission link is available below.

Thanks for reading. Do you feel that feeling of enlightenment I promised you? I know you do, in fact I feel it too. Now go on out there into the world and be somebody! See you tomorrow.

 




Soul City Music Co-op on Spotify:





Submit Music:
https://www.soulcitymusiccoop.com/submissions

Follow Soul Music City Co-op on Twitter:

https://twitter.com/soulcitymusicco

Official Website:

https://www.soulcitymusiccoop.com/

Genre(s):

Soul Music

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